A woodland image, taken from the forest floor looking up in to the tree canopy.

When did you last do something for you?

When I feel like things are spinning out of control I will stop and ask myself one question. When was the last time I did something for me? And I can guarantee that the answer will be ages ago.

Taking time for yourself can feel frivolous, especially if you are a busy mum, and when things get busy our needs are often the first things to get put on the back burner. It seems to come to us as naturally as breathing but it’s actually the worst thing we can do.

When we don’t take care of ourselves it becomes harder for us to take care of others. We may not realise it at the time but when we ignore our needs we become resentful of others and feel that we aren’t being appreciated enough. Here comes the hard truth. At times like these we push the blame outward when actually it’s us that are to blame.

Because when we don’t take care of ourselves we subconsciously tell ourselves that we aren’t important, that we don’t matter, that we are less than. Which is why if you’ve been putting yourself last for a long time your self-worth and self-esteem begin to crumble. It doesn’t have to stay that way.

Things won’t change overnight but you can begin to turn this way of thinking around. Whenever I feel like shit I journal. I write down everything I’m thinking and feeling and get it on to a piece of paper where I can see it. I then look for the links and the similarities. If it’s really bad and I can’t see the woods from the trees I’ll walk away, take some time and come back when the emotions aren’t running as high. I then start to ask myself a few questions:

  • Where am I doing too much?
  • Where can I ask for help?
  • Where am I wasting time?
  • What things am I doing that I don’t enjoy?
  • Where can I simplify things?
  • Where could I bring in more things I enjoy?

Taking responsibility for your situation and putting things in place to turn the tide will help you to regain control. As you start to notice where you’re energy is being taken unnecessarily and where you can begin to bring in more things that light you up, you’ll also notice those feelings of resentment begin to recede too.

So, when was the last time you did something you love, and where can you carve out pockets of time in your days to do more of those things?

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